Blood on the white coat

This short story has been influenced by a real incident but the scenes created are that of the writer’s own imagination and bear no resemblance to the course of actual events that may have happened.

Rhea hurried to the elevator. She was late and she knew mom would be angry. Well, of course she would be but could she even be blamed?

‘Come on Mom, you know where I work. You should have thought a hundred times before allowing your only daughter to take up medicine as a career…’

‘And then you chose to do an MD in medicine as if MBBS wasn’t draining enough. Look at Neha. Isn’t she happy being a dermatologist? No night shifts either,’ that’s how Mom would respond.

‘I want to be a gastroenterologist, and for that, my mom, I had to do this,’ she would answer.

It was her dream and no matter how lucrative the other branches seemed, she wanted to become a gastroenterologist and to that choice, she was more than willing to do 36-hour shifts at a stretch.

‘No one is going to marry you. You will be an old maiden. Go on see.’ That would be Grandma, who vehemently opposed her career choice as a physician but Dad supported her.

‘There isn’t even one doctor in the entire family and my daughter has made me proud,’

‘Why gastro?’ Nitesh had asked over tea one day. He was her boyfriend, well almost, for she hardly had any time for him. Nitesh loved to call himself a self-proclaimed boyfriend. He was a surgeon and worked in another hospital.

‘Did I ever ask you, why surgery?’

‘Yeah, but I don’t plan to super specialise,’ he’d retort. ‘I’m okay being a surgeon.’

‘Well, I want to,’ she would end the discussion.

‘We have to get married, Rhea,’ he would protest.

‘Gimme some time to think, Nitesh. There is a lot on my mind these days, the finals are just around the corner and God knows I hardly get time to open my books,’

‘I have no problems as long as you promise to marry me,’ he would plead.

It would make her smile. She liked Nitesh but with too much on her plate right now. Love was one emotion that would have to wait.

Years ago, she had lost her friend and the love of her life to a cancer of the gut. She had been hardly twenty-three then, and in the final year of her medical school. Life had changed after that. Not many knew of their silent relationship for he was studying at the IIT and had a promising future, and just like that, he had died leaving her alone to mourn a loss that no one knew about, and then she had decided to take up gastroenterology as a career.

Nitesh had arrived un announced into her life and she had begun to appreciate the beauty of life once again but maybe love would never enter her heart one more time. Nevertheless, life was moving at its own designated pace and she was almost happy in the flow..

With these thoughts in her mind, she looked around the food court where she had decided to meet mom for lunch. It was almost 3 pm and mom would be mad.

She checked her phone which she had forgotten to switch back after the ward rounds. It was still switched to flight mode.

‘I am so dead,’ she cursed herself.

12 missed calls, 3 from Nitesh and 9 from mom.

There was a WhatsApp message. ‘Waiting at the food court, hope you didn’t forget we have to go shopping,’ It had been sent at 1:30 pm.

Mom would have left by now, she looked around in anxiety.

She dialled her mom’s number, readying herself for the violent outburst that was about to follow.

‘My dear daughter,’ is what she heard instead.

‘You aren’t mad or something,’ she said in a soft voice.

‘No, but why should I be,’ Mom replied. ‘I had such a gala time waiting for you in that small cubicle, hardly the size of our washroom; thought you liked some personal space while eating out,’ Mom sounded sarcastic.

‘I knew this was coming,’ she whispered. ‘Don’t blame me, the clinical round ended around 2:30 pm and I…’

‘I know sweetie; just keep your phone on vibration mode at least. I am your mother and I tend to worry,’

‘I would do that, Mom, but you know na, that I usually turn off my phone during the rounds. Any small noise, even if a vibration of the phone and HOU would literally ban me from the rounds for the next entire week. He wants pin-drop silence during the rounds. You do understand mom, don’t you?’

‘Oh, okay darling, I do; well almost. Anyway, come home straightaway now. I already reached. We will order something nice to eat,’

‘Okay, but what’s the occasion,’ she asked, walking towards the car parking, her phone glued between her shoulder and cheek as she searched for her car keys in her handbag.

‘No special occasion, but only two of us are home, and I thought we’d have some alone time,’

‘Where is everyone else?’ she asked unlocking the car door.

‘Up at a wedding; I thought I’d stay behind. You must be tired after your shift,’

‘Oh, it's Bunny’s engagement party,’ she whispered. ‘How could I forget?’

‘Yes, and she’s already getting married next year and look at you?’

‘Stop it Ma, now, will you? She’s gonna kill me for being absent. Gimme a moment Ma, I’ll start the car,’

‘No, carry on. Be home in time I’m waiting.’

‘Love you, Mom,’ she hung up.

Life was good. Rhea thought. Next month she’d sit the final exams for her MD in medicine. She hoped to secure good marks and although she was a very studious person yet the thought of the final postgraduate exam could make anyone jittery. The problem was that HOU still hadn’t given them the long-promised off before exams.

‘One last night shift Rhea and then we will speak with Professor. Can’t be preparing for the finals amidst such a busy schedule,’ she told herself as the car drove along familiar roads.

Mom was waiting for her and as she shoved the bag aside, she got her some cold water to drink and then sat next to her and patted her hair.

‘You look tired, and look at those bags under your eyes…’

‘What do you expect Ma, after a crazy thirty-hour shift? I hardly got time to sleep. The ward was so crowded and most of the patients were really sick, and to be honest, there is no place where I could sleep without getting disturbed by an attendant or two. Every 10 minutes, there is a knock on my door, although I make sure that I have done all the required work and prescribed everything in my clinical note, but I can’t blame them either. I know how it feels like to be on the other side at the hospital,’ she said, downing the water in one gulp.

Mom looked at her with a smile on her lips.

‘I’m proud of my daughter. It’s just that I wonder how are you going to get through life with such a hectic schedule. Will you ever have some ‘me’ time?’

‘I don’t even think about a ‘me’ time, Mom. Time will tell. For now, I’m starving. Please let’s eat something and God knows I really want to doze off,’

Between one night duty to another night duty, time flows really fast and for Rhea, it went superfast this time because the space she had was filled up with intense pre-examination cramming sessions. She hardly ate or slept. It was a crazy week no doubt.

‘HOU ought to give us at least three weeks to prepare. This is crazy,’ said Anna, the studious one and also the most anxious of the group. The girls were sitting in the canteen having lunch.

‘He said, he would,’ added Nidhi. She was the hopeful one and had a positive attitude about everything in life. The three had been together since the first year of their postgraduation, ‘I heard the second year pg’s telling each other, ‘Yaar ab to night loads will increase as seniors are going to be taken off the roster,’

‘And when would that be,’ asked Rhea, ‘with just three weeks to the exam,’

‘Chill bro,’ said Nidhi, ‘we will all get through. HOU might have been tough on us during the tenure, but he never failed anyone in their exams,’

‘I don’t just want to pass; I need to secure good grades.  I am going for DM and he’ll have to put in a good word,’ Rhea said with a sigh.

‘Well then, good luck to you,’ said Nidhi. ‘By thy way, is it your 36-hour shift today?’

‘Yeah, she replied, ‘and trust me, I haven’t slept in days,’ she added, picking up her white coat and stethoscope. ‘Thanks for the lunch,’

As she headed off to the ward she could feel her head throbbing.

‘Should have grabbed a coffee,’ she thought. ‘I guess I will order it in the room,’

But as soon as she was about to enter the room that was just next to the ward, she could see a nurse rushing in her direction.

‘Quick doctor, bed no.3 has collapsed. We had to begin CPR…’

‘Oh no, he was doing so well since yesterday,’ she rushed alongside the nurse. ‘Hurry, announce code blue and…’

‘Already did,’ said the nurse.

Later, after a gruesome and tiring forty-five minutes of resuscitation, as the patient was shifted to the ICU, Rhea fell down on her bed and dozed off. It was the most peaceful sleep she had had in the last one week but sadly it was very short lasting. She was up in fifteen minutes as the senior resident called her for some patient that was known to a fellow doctor.

‘Get back to me with all relevant information in 10 minutes,’ he hollered over the phone.

‘Okay,’ she said as she put down the phone. The headache came back with double intensity and she felt retching. Rushing into the washroom she vomited with a pain rising in her throat. Something she ate hadn’t suited her well.

She sat down on the bed in agony.

‘Don’t think I can make it through this night. Should have exchanged my shift with someone,’ she groaned. The ward was full of very sick patients and it was unlikely that she could get any rest at all, even for just an hour or two

Rhea dragged through the day with unease, waiting for the ward to be a little quiet at night. Most of the patients had been taken care of. She hoped to get some sleep tonight. It was already 11 pm.

‘Okay, so let’s finish the rounds,’ she said to the staff nurse on duty. What about that patient in the private room? How many more do we have?’

There is no one in that room Doctor. He left without telling anyone,’

‘You should have informed me...’

‘He was there at five pm but then when I returned with the injections at six, he was gone,’

‘Maybe he returned. Why would he leave un announced?’ asked Rhea.

‘Anyway, let’s go and check,’

Private rooms were meant for the VIPs or patients who could afford to book them. These rooms were mostly separated from the main ward and were cleaner and well kept.

The two women turned into the corridor lit with flickering lights where the private rooms were located.

‘Some problem with the electricity,’ said the nurse to no one in particular.

A guard was sitting in his chair at the far end and it looked like he was about to doze off anytime soon. He couldn’t be blamed either. This hospital was overworked and understaffed and he was past middle age.

Sure enough, the private room was vacant and the bed well made.

‘Why didn’t anyone inform me? asked Rhea in anger as they turned to go but she had to hold on to the door as she felt she was about to fall down.

‘What happened, Doctor?’

‘It’s just that I feel too tired. Was about to faint I think,’ she said.

‘Here, lie down on the bed, Doctor,’ she helped her, ‘and here, I will put a pillow under your feet. You’ll feel better…’

‘Yes,’ said Rhea feebly

‘We got any more patients?’ she asked.

‘No. the ward is quiet as of now. But you really look sick. Should I inform the SR?’

‘I’ll be fine It’s just that I haven’t slept in days, with work and exams clashing with each other.’

‘I understand, Doctor,’ said the nurse sitting next to her.

‘You can rest here for a while and if needed I will call you,’ she said. getting up. ‘Are you sure you don’t need an IV fluid or something?’

‘No, I’m sure, yes, I guess I will relax here for an hour or so, if need arises give me a ring,’

‘Sure thing,’ said the nurse. ‘Just lock the door from inside,’

‘Okay, I will in a while…’

‘Call me if you need anything,’ she repeated

‘Don’t worry I will be fine, just take care of the ward for me for a couple of hours...’

‘Sure, no issues,’

Rhea stared at the ceiling where a small fly was tracing its path along the light. Cool air circulated from the ceiling fan and before she could think anything or get up to bolt the door, she had dozed off into a dreamless sleep.

She woke up with a start as someone clutched her wrists and climbed on top of her. Before she could utter a word or scream for help, a pair of rough, sweaty hands clasped her mouth shut. She could see unknown, red eyed, drunken faces hovering over her. A stench of bad alcohol hit her nostrils and she tried to set herself free. There were three of them.

Someone ripped apart her trousers and pulled her legs apart. Her pelvic bones gave way, and she could feel her ribs breaking under the pressure of not just two but three men. Blood came out of her mouth in frothy bubbles. She tried to bite her assaulter’s hand but a tired and frail doctor was no match for the goons who were raping her by turns. The last recollection she had of anything was the tightening of her stethoscope around her neck and a choking sensation as if her lungs would burst and then all went silent.

Rhea died quietly in the very hospital where she had dreamt of becoming a gastroenterologist. ‘She died with blood on her white coat and a wound in her heart. Her eyes were open’ said the news headlines ‘and her mouth tightly shut,’